This week we took the kids on their first interstate trip to Queensland. It felt appropriate for their maiden voyage of Australiana to be a dip into the heart of Ozzie tourism, the sunny Gold Coast. We did everything you should do when you go to Gold Coast. We spent the day at Dreamworld and then another at WhiteWater World. We ate out almost every meal and the kids made the most of the water park at the resort. Here are a few mental snapshots I took.

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Shot One: Mid-fifties Barbie. 

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It was our first night in Gold Coast. We had checked into the Paradise Resort later than expected after hitting 5 o’clock traffic from the airport. Paradise Resort claims to be Heaven for Kids and Paradise for Parents but I was sceptical as we drove past their four life size mascots that guarded the resort entrance like those statues out of the never ending story with the laser eyes. It felt like we were passing the threshold into some sort of 24/7 funbugs where everything was designed to entertain and delight children aged 0 to 8. Once we found our room in Captain Quarters (headed by the turtle mascot) we headed straight into town to give the kids a taste of Friday night in the Gold Coast.

It didn’t take long before people started to look different. There was a woman walking in front of us who was wearing 6 inch stilettos and Alice was fixated. ‘Look at her shoes Mum’ she whispered as we walked behind her. The shoes were just the beginning. She was tall, blonde and dressed a little like Sandra D from Grease. At first glance you’d think she was late 20’s, with her toned silhouette but on closer inspection she was closer to 60 but that is a wild guess. She’s had so much work done that I wasn’t quite sure where to look. She looked amazing and Alice was speechless. She was American and on the arm of one of the muscliest and most heavily tattooed dudes I’d ever seen. His neck was so wide that he almost looked square. We chatted to them briefly whilst waiting for the pedestrian lights. Both were absolutely lovely people and the best introduction into Gold Coast living. 

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Shot Two: Full Moon

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We brought a reasonably priced family pass to DreamWorld, WhiteWater World and Skypoint. The kids were so excited about going. I had been to Dreamworld years ago with an ex boyfriend and friend of mine so it felt familiar but closer to deja-vu than real memories. The first ride we went on was the King Claw which was horrific. 40 people sit facing out around a central pinwheel which is swung higher and higher while rotating until you're some 40 m above the ground and moving close to 100km. I honestly thought I was going to die. I was screaming, swearing and manically laughing all at once which honestly isn’t something I want my kids to see. The kids loved it and it set the thrill level for the day. 

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We did all the ‘Thrill rides’ throughout the day, including the Steel Taipan, which is a massive roller coaster that has you doing all sorts of unnatural movements at lightening speed. It was a family favourite, along with the Giant drop which takes you 119m up into the air only to leave you dangling for 40 seconds before it lets you free fall safely back to earth. I didn’t mind this one because it was over in a few seconds but the waiting at the top was quite awful. 40 seconds is a long time when you know something shocking is about to happen. 

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We ended up sticking around for the night market and everyone was allowed to do one last ride. Alice chose the Giant Drop just as the sun was setting so we lined up hoping to get the west side of the ride. Unfortunately we got to the east side which was disappointing until we rose above the barrier to see the fullest, largest Moon ever rising over the horizon. For those 40 seconds I almost forgot what I was doing until I plummeted 100m in 2 seconds.

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Shot Three: Online Doctor

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Maybe it was the sun, maybe it was the 50SPF sunscreen I was using on my face but I woke up with the angerist, red rash all over my face the day after Dreamworld, just in time for our day at WhiteWater World. Thank goodness there are online doctors available because by 8am that morning, I’d had an appointment with a very nice doctor who took one look at me and said, that's Rosacea, you need antibiotics today and stay out of the sun. Great. My face looked awful and it hurt! Luckily WhiteWater World is next to a mall, so I brought the biggest sunhat I could find to protect me from the sun and hide my raging face. Matt took charge at the park and I regressed into a shady lounger to wish the rash away. 5 days on, I still look embarrassed. 

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Shot Four: Emergency Services everywhere

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We’d had overpriced italian for dinner and wandered back to the resort full and ready for bed. Sharing a room with the kids was challenging because I like to go to bed early and they like to stay up late because it's the holidays. I was brushing my teeth in the bathroom when I heard a muffled announcement over the intercom. My family informed me that we may be evacuated. Inconvenient but I was still dressed so it could’ve been worse. A few minutes later it was undoubtedly a fire alarm and all 1200 guests were evacuated. 

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Matt and I were playing it cool as we shuffled down stairs to the front of the building but as we passed the central area it started to smell like burning rubbish. Once we were outside, we could see the plumes of smoke and just had to cross our fingers that my birthday presents wouldn’t burn before I got to open them the next day.

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We were outside for 2 hours while the fire was put out and the building checked for air quality. Lucky ‘Captain's quarters’ was fine and we could return to our room. The kids were exhausted by the end of it but I was grateful that we didn’t have toddlers like most of the families there. We did get a $100 voucher to spend on food for our inconvenience which we made use of on our last day.

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Shot Five: Supernormal overlooking the Brisbane River

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It was my birthday on Tuesday, 44 years old. Matt had planned for us to have the day in Brisbane which is just over an hour from Gold Coast. I love Brisbane having been there several times for the The Design Conference. This time I got to hang out with my family at one of my favourite restaurants. I didn’t even know there was a Supernormal in Brisbane but I love the one in Melbourne, so it was a real treat going there for my birthday lunch.

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We’d given the kids a pep talk about fine dining before we arrived and they both did a wonderful job of keeping their shit together. Everyone did. The food was amazing and I don’t think we’ve ever spent so much money on non-alcoholic fizzy drinks. The kids loved how each meal was explained as the waiter placed them on the table. Lunch lasted for 2 hours which was probably the best birthday gift of all.

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We had to rush back to GOMA to make our session for the Jim Henson exhibition which was amazing. Another birthday surprise. I never knew how emotional it would be seeing the real Kermit the frog or the actual set for Fraggle Rock. The Skeksis are as scary as you’d imagine they would be in real life standing taller than me.

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It’s nice to be home but I do miss the steady supply of fresh, thick face clothes that I could gently dab on my inflamed cheeks.